What's in our brain?
Being confident and coherent in my speech and getting my ideas across to people I interact with clarity is something that I was not very good at. There were (and still are) times when someone would ask me a question about myself or what I do in college, and I find myself stuttering or adopting a low tone when speaking. I never stopped to think about what the reason behind this is- why did I find it so hard to tell people something about myself confidently? What stopped me from expressing conviction in my thoughts and feelings at times?
I recently came across Chinese American freestyle skier Eileen Gu's interview at a women's leadership event at Singapore Management University (SMU), where she talked about competition among women in the Olympics, and how most of the dynamics surrounding self-confidence and focusing on our work and on where we hope to go in our lives rather than comparing ourselves with the journeys of others around us. Something that really struck me about the interview was about how she spoke so openly and freely with a bright and peppy tone, and also how she spoke eloquently with little to no pauses in her speech. Moreover, it highlighted something about how she perceived herself on the inside- she was very There are times when I feel like a pause for a little too long when speaking, filling the gaps with 'ummm..' and 'like', and it is these little things that determine whether what you are saying is comprehensive and coherent.
When I went back and looked at some more of her interviews, there was one where she talked about metacognition- thinking about your own thinking. In other words, it about being more fully aware of the route that our minds take to arrive at the thoughts, morals and beliefs that we formulate and modify throughout our lives. Our experiences not only shape these, but also how we think what we think. It was introduced in the 1970's, and I found it strangely intriguing that it has only come to light on a larger scale now. At first, I thought it made zero sense- 'What does it mean to think about our thinking? How is one supposed to that? We just think...don't we?'
I have always felt that I was a much better writer than I was a speaker. Words come more naturally to the tip of my pen than to the tip of tongue, but as I tried learning more about this each day, I realized that writing could actually help me gain more insight into my own thinking, and expose its strengths, gaps and weaknesses. It was also then that I realized that all of us probably carry out metacognition unconsciously everyday- it is hidden in decision making, showing consideration and respect towards others, going about our daily tasks and duties, and working towards our goals. It's just that when we do all these various activities, we never stop to think what actually drives the thinking behind these actions. Once we get accustomed to something, our brains tend to go about them on autopilot, without stopping to evaluate various other possibilities and scenarios. I guess this is also something I continuously try to work on- to pull myself out of autopilot, out of the instructions put down on a book or protocol sheet, and to really evaluate and try to understand why I am doing what I am doing, and what I would do if something turned out different than usual. Asking more questions and actively engaging in thinking about all the places where metacognition could be put to good use would help us achieve a much higher level of self-awareness and regulation and thereby increase our productivity and the quality of our efforts and outputs, be that in work or in our personal lives.
Listening to Eileen Gu's interview made me think about a lot of things, and how interesting, and freeing it is to know that by controlling what you think, you can essentially control who you are and who you would like to become. If you want something in your life, it is up to you to put in the work and ask for it, to go get in and not be dependent on anything and anyone else to take you to the opportunity or the goal. I felt that the more I try to practice metacognition and really think about the roots of my thoughts and behaviors, and what I can do to reinforce them or modify them, would help me to gradually build that confidence and conviction which I need to continue to work and build upon. Over the past 1 year and a half, I believe that there have been more moments when I have stepped out of my comfort zone in an attempt to explore my full potential, and to understand what I can do differently, how I can change my approach toward public speaking, and even speaking in a general sense. Enhancing this by analyzing the day's events, and understanding what went well and what didn't, and how I can handle similar instances next time would help keep track of it, in a way. Of course, there are a lot of circumstances that are out of our control, and we may not be in full possession of our minds at all times, but training ourselves to become aware of our habituated responses and choose how to respond next time.
There's always a lot to learn, and we are all on this journey called life, where learning knows no bounds and no end. Metacognition is just one of those things that makes those journeys unique for each of us!
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