Why do women love vampires so much?
“And so the lion fell in love with the lamb.”
“What a stupid lamb.”
“What a sick, masochistic lion.”
(Edward and Bella, Twilight)
Vampires, the blood-sucking monsters. In theory, vampires should be something we fear, something we avoid, but for some reason we’re attracted to them. As a vampire lover myself, I have noticed that women mostly enjoy vampire stories, especially vampire romances. Today, I'll explore why women lean toward vampire fiction.
Only a vampire can love you forever.
I believe that one of the biggest reasons why women (and people in general) love vampires is because only a vampire can love someone forever. A vampire is the natural hunter of humans, but in these love stories, the vampire is always able to control their killer urges for only one person in the entire world. There is only one weak human who will become a vampire’s whole world. Vampire love stories can go two ways: the vampire could refuse to turn their human, or the human also becomes a vampire. Either way, the reasoning behind both choices could be seen as romantic. A vampire refusing to turn their one true love into a monster shows how much they want to protect them. They refuse to curse them to immortality. On the other hand, when a vampire gives in and turns their love into a vampire, it shows how committed they are. A vampire relationship has no end. Sure, the vampire curses their loved one, but it’s a curse that they’ll deal with together, forever. Women love vampire love stories because they have traits they want in a real human relationship. What girl wouldn’t want to be their partner’s entire world? What girl wouldn’t want to be protected by their partner? What girl wouldn't want to be with their partner forever? Modern dating is so messy and confusing that a vampire loving a human makes perfect sense.
"Know only this, mon cher: You are the only being I trust, and whom I love, above and beyond myself. All my love belongs to you. You are its keeper. A veil will now forever separate our union. But it is a thin veil, and I’m always on the other side, face pressed up against your longing."
(Lestat, Interview with the Vampire 2022)
The liminal space between life and death.
Vampires live in a very unique space. They are not fully deceased like a zombie, but they also are not fully alive. Vampires are special because while their bodies may be dead, they still (in a sense) have a human soul. In this liminal space, vampires are not condemned to the same social norms that we humans are. Things like money, education, and race don’t have the same influence. Who cares about how much money you have when you’re a killer being who lives forever? It’s this special in-between space that makes vampires attractive. As a vampire, you can leave worldly struggles behind. There is no need to worry about graduating on time, finding a job, a house, or starting a family when you have all the time in the world to achieve things. As humans, our life clock rushes us to accomplish something with our lives. As women, we are rushed to start a family before we’re “too old.” Being a vampire takes away the feeling of not having enough time.
Liminal spaces are also just a special place to be in. It's a place of transition. When it comes to the space between life and death, it's a place where deep psychological and emotional feelings can take place.
Forever beautiful.
Every woman understands the pressure of conforming to the beauty standard. It is always at the back of our minds. We are never pretty enough. The standard is always changing. Society went from model skinny to curvy and to skinny again. It's hard to keep up. Society tells us that we are only worth something when we are young and beautiful. In more recent media, vampires are depicted as being extremely beautiful and young. No matter what century, vampires are forever gorgeous. As superficial as it sounds, we crave to be considered beautiful; we want to feel and be seen as attractive, and in a world where the standard is constantly changing, being a vampire –who is always the standard– is very tempting.
A monster can control itself.
What is interesting in recent vampire media, like Twilight and The Vampire Diaries, is that there is always a vampire that can control itself, that doesn’t give in to its bloody urges as easily. Edward can resist draining Bella of all of her blood, even when it’s so tempting to. Crime against women has always been a problem. No matter how advanced we become, women still have some fear of being hurt. It seems like there is always a new story about a woman being hurt, abused, or assaulted. A vampire is able to control its monster instincts, while it seems like some men can’t. Part of what makes vampires so attractive is the restraint they have towards the person they love.
Overall, the vampire world is a space where we can imagine perfection. A space where modern dating struggles don't exist, societal pressure disappears, and our biological clocks stop and give us time. We love vampires so much because somehow the undead have everything we want. As long as the real world continues to throw struggles our way, we will continue to turn to vampires.
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